Hello single dads. I thought it would be beneficial to put down just a few tips for being a single dad. You may already do these or think “No duh!” but, I have to remind myself these tips and more all the time.
Please share some of your tips in the comments below as every situation is unique. Single dads can use all the help we can get. We just don’t always want to ask for the help.
No matter what, stay positive.
This is one of the best tips for being a single dad I can think of. I have to constantly remind myself to be positive. Make conscious decisions to be positive in any situation. Do your best to find the positive out of any negative situation.
You might say “My kid got sick just after he came to my house on Friday night! I had the whole weekend planned out and we were so excited. Now I fear the weekend is lost”. I would say “Thank God your son has YOU to take care of him”. That’s a positive in a negative situation right?
You can either think something positive, and help the situation or, let it make you upset. Obviously, your focus would be to help your kid feel better.
Do everything you can not to bad mouth your kids mother.
Your kids love their mom. The need their mom. You wouldn’t want her to talk bad about you to your children. After all, you are the World’s Greatest Single Father. By the way, I have not seen any of those awards at the store. Maybe there is a market for them.
When you bad mouth the mom it sends the wrong message to your kids. Do it enough and they will resent you. Do it a lot and they won’t want to be around you. Unfortunately, you won’t realize it until it’s too late.
Always communicate important things directly to the mom.
It’s not a good idea to have your kids give their mom a message for you. Keep the kids out way the important communication.
This can put way too much pressure on your kids and over time they won’t even try to relay the message. What happens when they come back with an answer to a question you asked that you don’t like? Will your disgust for their mom’s answer show itself to your kids? You be it will! Then you could get stuck in the negative circle trap.
Keep the kids on the same daily schedule.
If your kids are with you on a weekend try to keep bed time close to the same time as during the week. Don’t let them sleep in too late either. Kids do so much better when they keep the same sleep schedules.
You shouldn’t be trying to make it harder for their mom on Monday. Give the same respect you want to get. If you really don’t care then I suggest you re-evaluate your thoughts. When your kids are with their mom you should want them to receive as much love as possible. This will make things a lot easier for you in the long run.
Make the most of the time you have with your kids.
Basically, don’t hire a babysitter every weekend they are with you. This doesn’t mean you have to plan a crazy event filled weekend every time. Just being with your kids spending quality time will do wonders for your relationship with them.
Don’t use things at your house to compete with things at mom’s house.
There will be things your kids enjoy at their mom’s house like a Play Station or a bouncy house. Find different things they will enjoy at your house. In a perfect world these things would be equal.
Try to find a balance so they want to be at your house just as much as they would at mom’s house. This is very tricky since kids change what they want every 5 minutes. The principal to understand it that you should not want your kids to just be at your house all the time. Just like you wouldn’t want them to rather be at mom’s all the time.
- Stay positive no matter what happens.
- Do not bad mouth your kids mom in front of them.
- Don’t use your kids to communicate for you with their mother.
- Try to keep your kids on the same daily schedule.
- Make the most of the time you have with your kids.
- Don’t make your home a competition with their mom’s home.
These tips for being a single dad are just a few that I have found that really help me feel in control. Obviously this is not an exhausted list of tips. As I said, every situation is unique.
Please feel free to comment on these tips. Also, I would like to hear of some tips you have had success with. If you feel I can help answer any questions please ask. I will do my best to give an opinion that will help you.
Thanks for reading.